Archives For dating

In July 2006, I was thoroughly struggling with being single. I had no clue at that time that by November of that year, I would be dating Tim. I only knew that at the age of 25, I deeply desired to be married and seemingly had no prospects on the horizon. I took a personal retreat that summer and one afternoon I had this vision. I wrote it in my journal and it carried me forward into the days ahead. I want to share it with our readers today. Continue Reading…

The Roman Catholic Church as a new pope. The former Cardinal from Argentina was elected to lead the world’s 1.2 billion Catholics this afternoon, and has chosen the new name of Pope Francis. While reading the news articles, I wondered if the qualities of a new pope were similar to the qualities you would look for in a person to date or marry.
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4 Types of Dating

tim chan —  February 28, 2013 — 20 Comments

When a friend tells me that he or she is dating, I usually ask them to explain what exactly they mean by the word “dating.” When they give me a blank stare, I prompt them by asking: Is it casual dating? Serious dating? Courtship? Are you seeing each other? Friends with benefits? Hooking up? What’s the goal? Where is this relationship headed? “Dating” can mean so many different things.
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It’s our tradition to have pasta on Valentine’s Day. No, it’s not because we think Italian food is particularly romantic (although it is delicious). Nor are we trying to imitate that scene in “Lady and the Tramp.” It’s a tradition we’ve adopted because of what happened our very first Valentine’s Day as a dating couple.
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Earlier this year, Tim wrote a piece about looking for the wrong person to marry. “Thanks for writing this,” responded some readers, “now I know who NOT to look for. But I’m still left with the question, who DO I look for??” It’s a great question.

“You just know,” is probably the most unhelpful answer of all time. But if you took a poll of married people on how they knew they wanted to marry their spouse, that is a common answer you might get. Maybe if you were a very intuitive decision maker, you would just know (and if that’s the case, this article is not for you). But for the rest of us, although I don’t have all the answers, here are some factors that might be helpful when considering whether the person you’re dating is someone you’d want to marry. Continue Reading…

10 Fun Date Night Ideas

tim chan —  November 19, 2012 — 8 Comments

While we were engaged, one of our mentors advised us to keep on dating after we got married. Having regular fun and dedicated times together would help the marriage stay strong. We took their advice and have gone on a date every week for the last 4 years.
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Long-distance dating is hard. And given a choice, most people would probably avoid it.  But it’s also quite common. In this jet-setting age where people frequently travel for school or work, there’s a pretty good chance that at some point of the relationship, a couple will find themselves in separate cities. For some couples, the physical distance affects their relationship negatively and they eventually break up. For these people, their relationship can be described as, “out of sight, out of mind.” But for others, “distance makes the heart grow fonder,” and their relationship is strengthened during the time they are apart. Continue Reading…

How to Find a Mature Man

olive chan —  June 27, 2012 — 7 Comments

“I can’t find any mature men to date.” All too often, this is what I hear from women – especially Christian women.  They bemoan the fact that every man they know is not mature enough (or the mature ones are all taken).  Well, here’s what I think: the mature man is difficult to find because the mature man is a myth.  He does not exist.

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Marrying my wife Olive was one of the defining decisions I made in my twenties. This is the story of how it happened.

When I turned 23, I created a 5-year plan for my life. In year 3 I would travel for an extended time. In year 4 I would start dating someone seriously. By the end of year 5, I would be engaged. Things happened faster than I had planned. Four months before I turned 28 (the end of year 5), I was watching the beautiful Olive walk down the aisle to be married to me. This didn’t just happen. It was part of my plan. Mostly. Let me explain.
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[Finding My Voice is a series of blog posts on key decisions I made in my 20s.]

Defining Decision:  To marry Tim
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