Tim and Olive's Blog

In our marriage, we do our best not to shy away from a good fight. Resolving conflict in a healthy manner is high on our priority list. But even better than a good fight is a fight that is avoided. I’m not talking about ignoring the conflict or sweeping things under the rug. I’m talking about bridging the differences before a conflict occurs. Fighting takes a lot of energy and time, so if we can save it up for something more fun, we’d much rather do that.Read More

While we were engaged, one of our mentors advised us to keep on dating after we got married. Having regular fun and dedicated times together would help the marriage stay strong. We took their advice and have gone on a date every week for the last 4 years.
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Hi, my name is Tim and I struggle with depression. It’s hard to admit this and I haven’t always been able to write about my experiences with depression openly. But ever since becoming a husband, my relationship with my depression has changed for the better. These are some of my thoughts and reflections on being a husband and having depression.
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My name is Olive and I am addicted to taking photos and videos of my daughter. Especially on my phone.

Toward the end of my pregnancy, as we were preparing for our baby’s arrival, one of the things we did was upgrade my cell phone to a smart phone with a nice camera. We wanted the option of easily capturing the little moments and milestones of our baby’s life. But having the convenience of a good quality camera within arms reach at all times has been both a blessing and a curse.
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Spoiler Alert: In this post I write about The Hunger Games trilogy written by Suzanne Collins and refer to parts of the plot.] 

After reading the last book of The Hunger Games trilogy I felt sick to my stomach. It was more than a sadness that I felt: it was a mixture of disgust and despise. This was the closest to hatred that I had felt in a long time. The feeling I felt was towards war.
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[This is a guest post I wrote for Hello Vancity]

I still remember setting the table with my heart pounding and palms sweaty, silently praying that my parents and their friends would genuinely like the food. I was in Grade 8. Making a meal from scratch and serving it to guests was my final project. My grade for Home Economics was dependent on their review. What exactly I served, I can’t recall anymore. I think there was a stew and some vegetables. Of course, my mom, being very proficient in the kitchen and known among her friends as a great cook, helped me put most of the dinner together. But she still bragged to all her friends that her 13-year-old cooked for her. She would half-jokingly remark that I could now do all the cooking for our family. The prospect of which was truly frightening.
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I always thought the life of a stay-at-home parent was easy and fun. You get to play with a baby all day, and when the baby naps, you have all this time to yourself. Now I am a part-time stay-at-home dad, and the reality of the situation is very, very different from what I expected.
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Our grandfather Yee-Noon Chan passed away last night. This is our tribute to him – first Olive’s, then mine.

Last night, for a brief moment, a baby’s laughter filled the room where a frail, 91 year-old man lay dying. The child was my daughter. The man was her great-grandfather – the father of my husband’s father. This was the second and final time she would ever meet him in her life.Read More

“So, are you going to change your last name?” I was asked this question again and again in the days leading up to my wedding. It was right up there with, “Have you found your dress?” People would find out I was engaged and for some reason, they would be interested to know if I was going to adopt the surname of my future husband. My answer was always, “Yes.”Read More

Long-distance dating is hard. And given a choice, most people would probably avoid it.  But it’s also quite common. In this jet-setting age where people frequently travel for school or work, there’s a pretty good chance that at some point of the relationship, a couple will find themselves in separate cities. For some couples, the physical distance affects their relationship negatively and they eventually break up. For these people, their relationship can be described as, “out of sight, out of mind.” But for others, “distance makes the heart grow fonder,” and their relationship is strengthened during the time they are apart.Read More