Tim and Olive's Blog

had a most amusing experience last night. after a long day of moving and unpacking and settling in, i’d gone to visit a friend in the next residence. coming back up to my room, i walked up the stairs and entered the suite. i noticed a girl sitting in the common room, watching TV so i stopped to chat with her. since i’m living with three new people this year, it didn’t occur to me that i’d never seen this girl before. i clued in that something was wrong when she looked at me funny and asked me if i lived there. then i realized, i was on the wrong floor! i ended up talking to her for about an hour and we found out that we’re in the same tutorial for one course (even though we’re in different majors!) praise God for new friendships, especially random ones. ;)

OPEN BOOK

i was talking to someone at a party tonight and since i didn’t know her, i introduced myself and got her name. then, she commented that she’d heard lots about me and that got me curious. what i wasn’t prepared for was that she proceeded to tell me that she knew that i’d gone on a missions trip, helped with TC worship and was involved in York CCF… basically, my life story! (i’m just thankful i was talking to a girl!)

anyway, i’ve always been aware of the importance of integrity, but this incident only emphasizes it all the more. :p

ONE STEP

i am praying. in my mind, i see myself taking one step. it seems as if i’m walking off a cliff, onto thin air. i have been here before. but this time, i suddenly notice there is water beneath my feet. then i am aware of a Presence. i hear His voice, “do you trust me?” my eyes gaze upward to an outstretched hand. it is Jesus. He is standing on the waves in the midst of the storm, inviting me to step into this adventure with Him. i have been transported into Peter’s experience! i’m being offered an opportunity to walk on water with my Lord.

i know i have already been told that i must go to everyone He sends me to and that He will be with me and rescue me (Jer 1:7-8). my choice is whether or not to obey. whether or not to believe. i discover this: fear is persistent and stubborn. yet i know what to ask for: love.

LOVIN’ LIFE… TOO MUCH?

Come, Lord Jesus, Come. so the chorus went. as i stood there, i asked myself if i could really sing those words from my heart. was i eagerly expecting the return of Christ? at the moment, i could not say i was. sure, it would be awesome to be able to see Jesus face to face and to live in perfect love. but how could i ask Jesus to come soon when so many people around me still did not know Him? how could i turn a blind eye to the fact that all my classmates and most of my friends would be spending eternity without God if Jesus were to come back today? at this point, God challenged me: “Do you not trust me? Don’t I know the spiritual condition of each and every individual I created? Am I not a God of mercy? I will not let people perish without offering them my redemption.” He continued, “Are you not loving your life here on earth too much? Your activities, your friendships, your little lessons in life… Did I not call you to love Me and to love My Son? Why are you so hesitant for me to come back?”

hmmm… so much more to surrender.

WISDOM

A good name is better than fine perfume,
and the day of death better than the day of birth.
It is better to go to a house of mourning
than to go to a house of feasting,

for death is the destiny of every man;
the living should take this to heart.
Sorrow is better than laughter,
because a sad face is good for the heart.
The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning,
but the heart of fools is in the house of pleasure.
The end of a matter is better than its beginning,
and patience is better than pride.

SOLID ROCK

funerals are good at drawing out complex emotions. since my family is faced with three of them this saturday, i’ve been exploring the ideas of death and grieving. and i realize that death really is such a mystery.

tonight, i was at a practice for one of the services that i’ve been asked to sing at, and we were working on the hymn The Solid Rock (also known as My Hope Is Built On Nothing Less) and i found that the words were really appropriate to me this weekend. the funeral will be sandwiched between a mission team reunion and a birthday get-together. so i’m basically setting myself up for an emotional roller-coaster ride. but supporting it all is my belief in Christ – the Solid Rock. so whether i laugh or cry, i know i am secure.

My hope is built on nothing less,
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ Name.

~Edward Mote and William Bradbury~

HANGIN LOOSE

did you know that in Psalm 46:10, when it says “Be still,” a literal translation of the hebrew is “let your arms hang down”? so in the midst of battle and fighting (the context for the rest of the psalm) God tells us to let go of all we’re holding onto. and when we do that, God will exalt Himself among the nations and in all the earth.

just a cool thought i wanted to share. :>

TRAPPING MONKEYS

i once heard this story in a sermon but tonight, it resurfaced to my mind. it’s probably not exactly as i heard it, but it’ll still illustrate the point.

in a certain jungle, a group of hunters were known for their unique way of catching the monkeys harassing their community. every evening, they would set out a large jar of nuts by the trees and go back to their homes. in the middle of the night, when everyone was asleep, the monkeys would come out and approach the jar. seeing that it held a yummy assortment of nuts, one of the animals would reach its hand into the jar and take a big handful. but then, panic would hit: the monkey wouldn’t be able to get its hand out! the fist, full of nuts, would not fit past the opening of the jar. and since the jar was too heavy for the monkey to lift, it had no choice but to stay stuck there, defeated, until the hunters found it the next morning. the key, of course, was that all the monkey had to do was let go of a few of those nuts and it would have been free.

i realized tonight that i’ve been acting like that monkey recently. i’ve been trapping myself by holding on to worries about things i should not be thinking of at the moment. so once again, i find myself stuck with my hand in the jar and God’s looking at me and prodding me “just let go a little! then you will be free to bring out the rest of the nuts in your hand to offer to me.” how i pray that i would be a wise monkey!

HOUSE WASH!

do clouds ever run out of rain?

about half an hour ago, i was sitting here at my computer when all of a sudden, i started hearing a loud pit-pat on the roof. i pushed aside my curtains and i saw huge drops of rain coming down. a couple seconds later, water was falling in sheets. it was breathtaking and awe-inspiring. witnessing this brief but powerful downpour made me feel like a little child again – seeing the world with eyes of wonder, amazed at the might of the Creator. this is the God i serve. this is the God who loves me! this is the God in whom my future rests secure. oh, let me dance in the puddles and sing in the rain. :D

FRUIT SALAD

mixed bag of feelings today. i went through most of today with Proverbs 13:12a running through my mind, characterizing how i felt. but just now, i had a really great conversation with a friend that got the wheels turning in this rusty brain of mine. the question we were debating was whether it’s possible to live anxiety-free in this life since Jesus calls us to it yet we are so prone to sinning (you can mull this over for yourself!).

*thanks for the mental aerobics! you lifted me out of my little pit today :> *

Proverbs 13:12. today it’s the first half. second half… soon, perhaps?