Tim and Olive's Blog

an email i received from my mom while i was in Japan:
hi nui nui,
i’m glad to hear that you are ok. i know who makes earthquakes and who makes you.
love,
mom

i thank God for a mother who knows that her job is not to worry about her daughter, but rather to trust in the One who gave her life in the first place.

during our first monday in Yamagata, i experienced my first earthquake. it turned out to be 4-point-something on the richter scale. [correction: it was a 7 on the richter scale, but it was centered in the ocean so we felt it less strongly.] since i’d never been through one before, i found it a fascinating sensation. but what was even more fascinating was the way God used the earthquake to show His sovereignty.

that night, God not only shook the ground, but the hearts of some of the Japanese people as well. some of my teammates were stuck in the subway for two hours, during which they were able to bring joy and peace to the hearts of the people around them by talking to them and playing games. our team in Yamagata was able to share the gospel with a number of students that night. and perhaps the most amusing of all, some of my other teammates had just finished singing “show Your power, O Lord our God!” when the earth literally shook.

having the earth shift beneath your feet is a disconcerting feeling. but what a contrast it is to the steadfast faithfulness of God, whose promises never fail!

TRAIN CROSSING

while our team was heading to Yamagata (a neighbouring city), we passed a train crossing. the bars were down and people were all lined up in their vehicles, waiting for the train to pass and the signals to stop flashing so that they could carry on with the rest of their lives. it seemed like a normal picture to me until i realized something: i was sitting on that train that those people were waiting for! the strangeness of seeing it from the other side was sort of eerie.

i guess that’s how it is sometimes with our lives. sometimes, we look at people and pity them for seeming to be stuck where they are in their spiritual journeys. or, we get distressed that people aren’t getting closer to Christ. and then God shows us that they’re not moving because we’re in the way!

anyway, it’s a short one today. but trust me, if you’re ever in a train and you pass a crossing where people are waiting for you, it’s a very weird sensation.

LEGACY

being home and slightly anti-social, i’ve been spending a lot of time chatting with my mom. tonight, she told me all about her side of the family. i was surprised and amazed to find out that my grandfather had lived in japan for a while, that he had been a judge in china and that after the communists took over, he fled to hong kong, where he wrote books teaching people the japanese language. i also found out that my grandfather had actually been sent to japan by china as a group of elite students to study there. and other than japanese, he was also fluent in english, and he studied german and russian. it turns out that my mother’s side of the family was intellectually brilliant.

last year, while talking to my father, i learned that my dad’s side of the family was very skilled in business. my grandfather on my dad’s side owned a huge business in thailand, which my uncles took over.

and then i thought, here were two huge families, both very successful in the worlds’ eyes, meeting at my parents, both the youngest of their families, and boiling down to me. while i’m a little overwhelmed and honoured to have such established family histories, it occurred to me that even though i have no super intellect or extreme money (or any money, really), what i possess is far greater than all of their legacy combined. because what i own is spiritual wealth, which is eternal and unfading in glory. my one grandfather’s books have all been lost now and my other grandfather’s riches will lose its value, but what i have now in Jesus Christ will last forever.

on a side note, finding out about my family’s link with the japanese people is amusing because in it, i can trace the finger of God and how He prepared me to go there. my ties with japan began way before i was ever born!

I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love?
Did I honour You enough?
To make a mark on things
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed You unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
~Nichole Nordeman, Legacy

OPEN HAND

praise God, i’m safely home!!! after forty days in Japan and five wonderful days in Vancouver, i finally got to sleep in my own comfy bed last night. :>

yesterday, my mom asked me to describe this trip in one sentence. after thinking about it for a bit, i came up with this: Life with Jesus is an adventure! i’ll expand on the idea in future postings, but i’ll leave this thought for the time being.

right now, God’s main lesson to me is that God doesn’t look at what i do for Him, but rather who i am in Him through Jesus Christ. because i believe in Jesus, i have the freedom to be myself before God, weak and broken, just as i am. but on the flip side, because i believe in Jesus, i also have the victory over my sin – because when God looks at me, He sees the perfection of Christ instead of the sinfulness of my own heart! so as i live my life, i do not have to live in fear of anything – whether it be people’s opinions, failure or trying circumstances. i can walk in boldness and confidence because i belong to Jesus. a few days ago, i asked God to show me what the gospel meant to me in my life and this is what i’ve come to understand. so now, as i face a summer of uncertainty (since i have no job yet and many other things are still unsettled), i face it with joy and hope. because what i do is not as important as who i am. and i know Whose i am.

ONE DAY

T-1week until i leave japan… and i finally have time to post something again!

one thing that has struck me while i’ve been here is the beauty of worshipping with people of other nations. at urbana three years ago, i experienced something like it, but here, in japan, i’ve been attending a japanese church so everything has been in japanese. learning to sing worship songs like Lord I Lift Your Name On High and I Could Sing Of Your Love Forever in japanese or simply just listening reminded me of just how big our God is. and God has blessed me with opportunities to actually sing as part of joint canadian/japanese worship teams! it’s such an awesome feeling that it only makes me thirst for heaven all the more. this morning was our last service at our church and i praise God for the chance to pray with my sisters here before leaving. it gives me comfort knowing that our Father is bigger than cities or countries or continents and that He will take care of each of us no matter where we are in the world. it also gives me much joy knowing that our Sayonara today is not good-bye forever because eternity will be spent in each other and in God’s wonderous company in worship!

Oh Lord, please have mercy on the people of the nations who do not know you yet! what glory it will be when people of all tribes and tongues will join together in praises of Your name!

WINDY SPIRIT, CALM SOUL

so i’m actually going. wow. i don’t know how often (if at all) i will be able to update this blog for the next little while. but i will return june 20.

God has shown me so very much this past week – mostly about my own sinfulness – that i had to walk home from church today. it was really windy, but i’m glad for it. ‘cuz somewhere in the wind, i was able to hear my thoughts and God’s responses better. He reminded me that He had purposed me for all that happens in my life and He reminded me that above all else that may happen in the world, He loves me beyond compare. so it is with a peace and calm that i sleep now and joy will fill me tomorrow (perhaps not so much when i wake up at 4am… but who knows? ;p )…

Dear God, please bless the friends i leave behind. they have been so good to me. i pray that in six weeks, when i return, we will have God-stories to share about how You’ve shown Your glory in our small lives on both sides of this planet. in Jesus’ sweet name i pray. Amen.

SAY WHAT?

while my mom and i were driving today, her cell phone rang. since she was driving, i answered it. i heard a voice and then i heard something very faint. since i thought the reception was bad, i just kept saying, “hello? hello?…” not hearing anything, i repeated it again. after about 20 seconds of this, i realized i was talking to a child and she was saying something to me. her mom had put her on the phone to say thank you to my mom for sending her a birthday present! and i had just rudely interrupted her numerous times!

after the phone call, i reflected on how that’s just like how i am with God a lot of the time. He’s trying to say something to me while i just keep blabbing on and on because i can’t hear His voice. and i get indignant because i don’t seem to get a response! anywho, that was just a “poke” from God today. ;p

on a side note, if anyone’s an earlybird and is crazy enough to come see me off, my flight out on monday is at 7:25am. so i’ll be at terminal 3 at 5:30am! honestly, i don’t expect anyone ‘cuz if i wasn’t the one flying, i wouldn’t be there either! hahaha…

…

packing, packing, packing… don’t really want to. but i know i have to… don’t know where to begin. hm, maybe doing the laundry would be a good start? ;p never thought i’d have so many mixed feelings and at such intensity. i wonder if this is a common thing for people to experience before leaving on a missions trip? …dunno. anywho, not much to write today. just one thing that’s stuck in my mind for almost a week now. in Chariots of Fire, Eric Liddel explains:

God made me for a purpose – to go to China. But God also made me fast… When I run, I feel His pleasure. Not to run would be to hold Him in contempt.

when i use my hands to make something beautiful, i feel His pleasure. and i pray i don’t hold Him in contempt.

WHAT HAPPENED?

since when did i become such a stressball? since when did life’s pressures get to me and steal away my sunshine? since when did the furrow between my brows deepen and establish itself as a frequent feature on my countenance? where did the carefree child run to? why is there a harrowed grown-up living in this mind? why do i not recognize myself?

how do i go back?

Oh Lord, grant me faith like a child!

SNEAK PEEK

from a recent journal entry:

Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!”
“Here I am,” he replied.

Here I am. Three words, spoken repeatedly by various godly people. Isaiah, Samuel, Abraham, Moses, Jacob… each of them knew where they were when they heard Your call.

So where is “here” for me? “Here” is as a student, a small but determined faith, a single woman, a Chinese-Canadian, a gifted artist, a beloved daughter, a soul struggling with pride and sin… Here is a place where I am redeemed and bought with no less than the very suffering and death of my Lord Jesus Christ. Here is at 22 years, just starting her life. Here is in Toronto, heading to Sendai. Here is a worship leader and fellowship chair. Here is where I have yet to make a journey, yet to discover the full extent of Your love, yet to overcome the challenge of my own ultimate sacrifice. This is here. And here I am.