Tim and Olive's Blog

Witness is not a verb. You don’t go witnessing, you ARE a witness.

i heard this about five years ago at a student conference. and today, i was reminded of it again in a conversation with my friend.

i spent most of my day drafting in our classroom/studio. being in a class of eight girls makes for many conversations and lots of silliness. but anyway, my friend made a comment today that really made me think. she said, “the world needs more cool Christians like you… people who don’t just condemn everything…” and then she said, “i admire you. you have so much confidence in yourself. i was just telling my friend about you the other day. how you always seem to know who you are, where you’re going, what you’re doing…” and i realized that i do know who i am and where i’m going. i know because of Christ! i realized that even though i hadn’t preached the gospel to her, God is drawing her closer to Himself. i continue to pray that one day soon, i will have the opportunity to explain the Reason for my confidence and that she will be able to recieve it as her own.

PALMS-UP LIVING

here’s another posting i’ve been meaning to write for a long time…

back in the summer, i was at a worship service and the worship leader lead a “palms-up/palms-down” prayer. with our hands lifted with the palms up, we prayed for blessings and grace. with our palms down, we gave up our sins and worries. while i thought this was an interesting way of physically illustrating our interaction with God, i’ve been thinking more about what it means to live with my palms up.

to me, having my palms up signals a position of giving and receiving. with my palms up, i can offer up to God all that i have, whether it be my gifts, talents, anxieties or sins. and there, i am also in a place to receive God’s word, blessings, grace and forgiveness. when i stand with my empty hands turned upwards, it symbolizes my nakedness in front of God; i have nothing to bring to Him other than myself as i am. last weekend, during a time of worship, God revealed a new meaning to me. when my palms are up, my hands cannot be closed in a fist. i cannot lift my palms like this. i must let go of my grasp on all the things my human nature wants to keep. i must open my hands and let God take or give as He chooses. it doesn’t mean i will lose everything i have. it means that God has complete control. it’s surrender.

STRANDED

last night, while i was driving home on the highway, my car broke down. by God’s grace, i had enough momentum in my car to pull onto the shoulder of an offramp before it stopped moving completely. i was driving alone and it was about 9:30pm. i had enough batteries in my cell phone to call home and tell my dad where i was. after that, i could only sit in the darkness, wait and pray. i was quite frustrated when the phone died but in the midst of my chaotic mind, Psalm 121 broke through. He will not let your foot slip – he who watches over you will not slumber.…so i will wait for You to come and rescue me.

about half an hour later, a tow truck came by and the driver was nice enough to let me use his cell phone. i contacted my dad again and he told me that my mom was on her way to find me (as i’d taken my dad’s car that night). not long after that, my mom arrived and we could finally sort things out.

in the process of it all, i learned that the tow truck driver was out to catch unsuspecting victims and charge exhorbitant amounts for the service. when i asked him how much his fees were, he explained that if the OPP got to my car and ordered him to tow it out of the way, it would be $150. if we wanted him to tow our car before the police got there, it would be $75 for the hook up and $2/km thereafter. the regular rate should have been somewhere between $30-$40. needless to say, we kept with my dad’s friend’s towing service.

in the end, i got home 1 1/2 hours later than i’d expected with a few important lessons learned:
– God is faithful. don’t doubt Him.
– always go to the bathroom before you leave ‘cuz you never know how long you might have to wait
– i need a new cell phone battery
– don’t trust highway tow truck drivers. they prowl around looking for prey. (reminds me of someone else in this world who does this on a spiritual level…)

BLIND AND DEAF

“Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence, and I learn, whatever state I may be in, therein to be content.”
~Helen Keller

i picked up Helen Keller’s autobiography while i was at the browsing the shelves at the library today (yesh, i’m a nerd…). i’ve heard so much about her life and her courage in the face of losing her sight and hearing at the age of one, but i’d never actually read her story. so anyway, it hasn’t inspired countless numbers of people for no reason.

i’ve always had a fascination for people who function without their senses of sight and hearing and reading her story backed my belief that people without those senses are so much more observant than the rest of us who have all our senses. throughout the book, she keeps remarking about the beauty that is in the world and in nature. her wonder at the world is so rare and inspiring.

anywho, i’ll keep this posting short and leave you with a passage i thought was quite insightful…

…”in college, there is no time to commune with one’s thoughts. One goes to college to learn, it seems, not to think. When one enters the portals of learning, one leaves the dearest pleasures – solitude, books and imagination – outside with the whispering pines.”

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TORN

if you’re reading this to be encouraged, today’s posting might not be the one for you. i have some venting to do… but who knows, maybe you’ll be encouraged knowing that you’re not the only one struggling in this life? :T

there were moments today when i wanted to shut off the sound in the world; i was so frustrated at the things i was hearing. it was mostly what a couple of my friends were discussing. one of my friends recently got a boyfriend and the other one has had various relationships over the three years i’ve known her. anyway, they were talking about their boys and pretty much comparing them. their words were not specific in any way, but the innuendo was so explicit. part of me was disgusted and part of me was sad. disgusted because i really did not want to hear their conversation. sad because i knew that at the heart of the matter, they’re both trying to find security in relationships that only Christ can fulfill. and yet they’re both so adverse to Jesus. it makes me want to cry.

on the other hand, hearing my friend mention that the chocolates she had were from her boyfriend slightly stung my heart. i know there are other girls (and guys) who have promised God to leave this whole department to His timing so it’s not a solitary journey. but her comment stirred a desire in me. it also sent me running to the cross. i know that clinging to the nail-scarred hands is the only way i’ll pass through this darkness in safety.

SING PRAISE

wow, where did these last few days go? it’s saturday again and the last time i posted something was tuesday?!

aaaanywho… BBT Revolution was this weekend. i don’t think i’ve sang this much in a loooong time. three worship sets in two days – plus a singing lesson! :p yep, i’m pooped. but a happy and satisfied pooped. :>

been challenged to rethink servant leadership again… last night was the third time in the last six days that John 13 was brought to my attention. it’s the passage where Jesus washed his disciples’ feet. God doesn’t do anything by coincidence so he’s really got me thinkin. :> it’s quite possibly a reminder to give up my pride (again). ‘cuz pride has this nasty habit of slipping into my mind if i’m not conscious of keeping it away. i think i’ve also forgotten to serve the people i lead. *sigh* i’m so thankful for God’s grace. my brain handles so little and He challenges me with so much. :T

SPASTIC SHEEP AND OTHER STUFF

two separate ideas to write about today. but both just as meaningful…

–Spastic Sheep–
another poignant illustration by Louie Giglio this past saturday: baby sheep are spastic. full of energy and joy, they bounce around and literally run into their mothers. the sobering thought is this: if they don’t get fed, they will die.

–A Night In The Woods–
i heard this story on the radio maybe a month ago but i never got around to typing it up.
the rite of passage in a certain society required that the young person spend the night out in the forest amidst the bears and wild animals by himself. as evening approached, the child would be taken out into the wilderness, where a circle would be inscribed in the ground in which he would have to stay for the night. he would be left alone and as night fell, the sounds of the night would cry out in the darkness. as terrified as the child was, he could not leave his place. he had to face his fear and try to rest in spite of it. as dawn came and the sunlight broke through the trees, the child’s eyes would open to the truth: his Daddy had been with him the whole night, standing just outside the circle with his bow and arrow drawn, ready to protect his child from any danger.

SNACKTIME WITH JESUS

life is hard, but God is good.

last night, i heard one of the most encouraging messages on Jesus and the feeding of the 5,000. Louie Giglio shared his insights with us during the final session of the Worship Together Conference. he explained that when Jesus asked his disciples how they thought the people would be fed, He was merely testing them. the disciples wanted to come up with some brilliant plan to save the day, but in the end, they only managed to present a meager snack of bread and fish (which they’d probably bullied off of a poor kid in the crowd). it’s what Jesus did with the snack that was the most interesting. Taking the five loaves and the two fish and looking up to heaven, he gave thanks and broke the loaves. (Matt. 14:19) Jesus blessed it, broke it and multiplied it. the blessing and breaking happened together before it could be used to nourish the people.

in the same way, Jesus sometimes asks us how we propose to feed the multitudes. we want to say we have these mind-shattering plans, and we come to realize all we have is embarrassingly little. but He graciously accepts whatever “snack” we can give him – even if it’s nothing but ourselves. then, He blesses us and breaks us and sends us out there to feed the crowds. the best part is that from the very first moment, Jesus already knows what He is going to do. He doesn’t need us for anything yet He involves us anyway.

LIVING LIFE | LOVING LIFE

this evening, i attended a memorial service for one of my profs. he died unexpectedly last wednesday of a brain aneurysm. i had him for one semester in first year, but i never really got to know him. being there at the memorial and hearing all the stories about him sort of made me regret not dropping by to see him more. whenever he saw me in the halls, he’d always tell me, “don’t be a stranger now!” but i guess i kept myself a stranger.

anyway, from the reflections of all the people who shared tonight, it was obvious that this man lived his life well. he had a passion for living and his positive attitude radiated out to touch countless numbers of people. person after person went up to share about how he had believed in them and by doing so, he taught them how to believe in themselves. they mentioned that he was so proud of all his students but he had a really humble heart (before becoming a theatre professor, he’d studied both medicine and law). he stood for things he believed in and he encouraged everyone around him, whether they were his students or his colleagues. he was a Jewish man, and although i didn’t know him well, i would not be surprised if his qualities came from being close to God (but i don’t know that as a fact).

here was a man who was unafraid to invest himself in the people around him. here was a man who knew how to love. here was a man who had actually lived.

i was challenged tonight. challenged to love the people around me more. challenged to seize each opportunity to connect. challenged to stand by my convictions. challenged to give my life away for the sake of Christ. why? ‘cuz i saw the truth; that in giving my life away, i gain more than i could ever get by keeping it. ‘cuz giving my life away gives rise to other lives.

one last thought from the service, it was spoken by one of the students:

SUN WITHOUT LIGHT PART II

so i did my lighting presentation today. it went over very well. my original idea was to build a flower that was black on the outside that would open up to reveal layers of coloured material – reminiscent of how sunlight slowly allows colour to be seen. i spent most of my weekend trying to find a way to build the flower so that it would close like a bud and open like it was blooming. by 11:30pm last night, i still hadn’t found a way to construct it to my liking so out of desperation, i tried to think of other approaches. actually, by sunday night, i was already quite frustrated, but monday morning, i thought i came up with a solution (which later proved to be no good). anyway, while i was packing my stuff to go back to res, i happened to grab a coloured scarf and a yellow rose made of ribbon, just in case i could use it to fill my flower.

so last night, in my state of exhaustion, i ditched the flower idea and thought i’d keep it simple; i’d use my hands to hold the scarf and slowly open them to reveal the “sunrise.” i have to explain my scarf, though. it’s a chiffon-like shimmery material that gradates from purple to light purple to white to orange. so as i held the yellow rose, i wrapped the scarf around it so that when i opened my hands, it initially would be purple, then it would slowly progress to show the orange and finally, the rose.

the second component to my presentation was music. just like the scarf idea, the music was also God-given. on sunday, i met with a bunch of girls at my church to rehearse a body-worship we’ll be presenting at tccc this coming sunday. the song we’re working with is Shout To The Lord, a version by Chris Tomlin. while we were rehearsing, i realized that the introduction sounded like a sunrise(!). so i decided to include it with my presentation. in the end, the audio and visual elements connected beautifully and i was just so relieved and thankful when it was over. :>

in making this project, i was reminded of a couple things about God:
1. His creative powers are just soooooooooo great. while it took me three agonizing days to figure out i can’t make a flower, He makes millions of them in a moment.
2. in using my hands to reveal the sunrise, i caught a glimpse of how God does that every morning when He opens His hands to reveal each day.

for all the frustration that went into it, i think that the experience was worth it. so i’m glad. :>